Home.

In the past couple years I've learned that home isn't always a place, sometimes home is a person. I've also learned that people change, just like we move from house to house and change the locations we call home you can do the same with people too. It's weird the sense of emptiness that is found once our home is lost. When the search begins to find another you truly realize the good and bad from the last. Nobody's perfect and this is true, but when the bad out weighs the good and the sad out shines the happy. It's time to call it quits and learn how to cope with the emptiness until someone more deserving can come along and occupy it. It's not a bad thing to forget how home felt, because it makes it all the better when we remember.

Accepting what we really deserve.

Every girl dreams of the perfect boyfriend, to be the "IT" couple and "rule" the school. Now my dream couple is a little bit different. I'm a bit more up the indie perfect couple. The couple that is painfully dorky and totally awesome, but only few think it. The insides jokes, little touches and the moments where we begin to realize that this might actually be real. It didn't take much for me to realize that this might be my chance, my opportunity to climb out of my pitiful broken heart and make it in to something so much better. When everything you want it right in front of you and you finally clear your head enough to realize that you deserve it, take it. In the movie perks of being a wallflower the stand out quote was an honest one. "We accept the love we think we deserve." I did that for two years, I'm finally starting to realize that I deserve a whole lot more. This time, I'm taking it.

Free Fall.

God presents us all with challenges. For those who are patient and enduring he rewards and for those who are eager and anxious he forces them to endure. Patients and perseverance  is always rewarded. When the sad times hit, they hit hard. When lonely comes it makes us feel as though we're drowning in nothingness, but the way he rewards is greater then all these struggles. He gave me love, he gave me the signs and presented me with an opportunity of happiness. It's quiet simple and he is quiet perfect. The combination of the best qualities from past loves combine in unison to create someone so alike and real it is hard to accept. My hesitation still remains because sometimes things really are to good to be true. With my breath held and my fingers cross I'm taking a chance on him, on myself. I'm ready to free fall in to something honest.

Not so sure.

Some people find comfort in others, I find comfort in running. I don't think I have ever made a decision without running it in or out of sense literally. Now with a new man on the front learning to let the old go is the hardest part. I set myself up for failure arranging plans around you, then us deciding "never" to speak again. Anyway, seeing you at college was just lovely. It was hard enough trying to avoid you, let alone wanting to see you at the same time. I have to say we've gotten pretty good at avoiding direct eye contact, but maintaining visibility on each other. I know what's best, but sometimes the worst things for you are the hardest to walk away from.